Pitch 1

July 25, 2016




From: Cameron Jensen

Hello David, I had a few questions about your pitch.

1. Are areas divided into levels or is on large asylum with one exit at the end?

2. What are the gameplay effects of the hallucinations or are they only thematic?

Either way your concept is interesting and seems like a cool gritty idea.


From: Logan Lowery

Hello David,

In you pitch, it seemed like what was said during the Pertinent Rules slide has little to do with what was on the slide. You may want to remove that slide, as it is just a list of words, and replace it with images relevant to what is being said. You should also mention some examples of the effects of the clarity, sanity and adrenaline bars, and what changes occur as they get lower.


From: Douglas Bertram


Have you thought about incorporating a periodic check from the staff. Any institution be it an asylum, prison, or a jail it is mandated that rounds are conducted to make sure everyone is where they are supposed to be. Something like that could force the player to plan more carefully and plan around the movements of staff.


David Bird

@ Cameron Jensen: The areas are going to be divided into four distinct areas over two floors, and there is two exits however one will be heavily guarded. The hallucinations will be mainly for enjoyment but if the player pays attention to the situations  and what the hallucination is about there will be hidden riddles them. Thank you for the comment!
@ Logan Lowery: Thank you I did not realize that it was not connected properly I have fixed it for the next video and I have also expanded on the explanation of the Clarity, Adrenaline and Sanity energies. Thank you for the comment!
@ Doug Bertram: I did not that is a great idea, thank you for the idea. It would make sense wouldn't it? I kind of had it in my mind that it would be more of an aimless wander for the staff, that kind of reflected the other patients within that particular section. Thank you for the comment!


From: Zachary Hiwiller (Instructor)

Ok, I get what you are trying to do with the theme song thing at the beginning, but it is loud, garbled, and jarring. It doesn't add anything to your presentation. I'd remove it.

Your hook slide needs to give what makes this different from other games in the genre. You let it serve as a marketing slogan. There are a lot of asylum games. What is this one? Why is it different? Be clear and don't rush through it. Your following "Objective" slide is a much better "Hook" slide than your actual one.

You have a lot of clip art here. Unless it is directly explaining how something works, it is visual clutter.

You can have your picture in picture window, but it isn't necessary.

You have an item economy and a stealth game here, but you never really explain how each works on a moment-to-moment basis. What can the player do? What are all the enemies? Do they have unique attacks? Are you defeated once spotted or do you have to be "captured"? How does a player hide? Do they snap to an object or is it just line of sight? How does enemy AI work? Are they on paths? What are the items? What do they do? How does negotiation work? Why would I trade instead of hoard? You have a lot of low-level elements here that need to be covered.


From: Dylan Wirth

Hey David,

The main thing I will say with your presentation is that maybe you should look into a different program for your recording. The large "Demo Mode" text in the middle of the screen is a little distracting. I think Discharged from Hell sounds like it has a lot of potential and it sounds like it would be an extremely fun horror game if done correctly. Good luck this month!


From: Shaun Ouellette

Hey David, 

I feel that you explained everything about your game very well. I would personally change a few of your slides, I see what you were trying to do with the intro, trying to set the mood for your game right from the start, however it was super loud compared to your voice in the rest of your presentation and a lot of your slides seemed kind of cluttered and I think that different images could help represent your game better.


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